God… I’ve had to fight so hard for this identity. This queer identity. I’ve lost so much for it; family, friends, a home, my faith, partners (even queer ones that couldn’t accept my nonbinary identity), nearly everything. The funny thing is, I’ve never regretted it. I’ve never once regretted coming out as queer or as nonbinary. I’ve lived on opposite ends of life stability – I’ve slept on park benches and dug food out garbage cans. I’ve also received a prestigious fellowship to complete my PhD. The contrast of those things in my life is stark, but they are deeply connected. Without the family rejection, without the stigma and discrimination I experienced on the street, I wouldn’t have found my chosen family, my unconditionally loving family. I wouldn’t have pursued a career in research to try help queer people be able to live their best lives.
What kept going through all of that - what keeps me going now, is me. My identity. Through all the struggles, all the ups and downs, I refused to compromise me. I refused to claim I was something I wasn’t, and I proudly clung to my queer self. I told myself, they can try to take every single last damn thing from me, but they can never take away my queerness. I own that. It’s my superpower.
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